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You picked Me,
A flower a couple of months back,
I was beautiful and white,
Perfect and sweet,
You took Me to Your world,
And that is where I weep,

You changed Me,
The only flower left,
Who didn't care what You did,
Hoping for Me You would care,
My petals wilt,
As My feelings wilt away,
And all I have left is thorns,
To get through day to day,

I loved You dearly,
You said You loved Me back,
You carressed My petals like You did My feelings,
But You asked of Me,
What I'd never do,
So My white petals turned blood red,

You changed Me,
The only flower left,
Who didn't care what You did,
Hoping for Me You would care,
My petals wilt,
As My feelings wilt away,
And all I have left is thorns,
To get through day to day,

You cheated Me,
I saw it with My own eyes,
I cried for so long afterwards,
I wanted die,
But I realised I still have Myself,
So My petals turned black and fell to keep gardners away,

You changed Me,
The only flower left,
Who didn't care what You did,
Hoping for Me You would care,
My petals wilt,
As My feelings wilt away,
And all I have left is thorns,
To get through day to day.
©2006-2009 ~chaotic-angel-raven
:iconchaotic-angel-raven:

Author's Comments

I got so frustrated and upset one day that I just wrote this down. I don't know any other way of describing it except for this- I wrote this for Myself. I didn't plan it with cleverly structured words or stanzas- it just was what I wrote down- if it doesn't make any sense to any one else, that's fine- I wrote it for Myself.

Comments


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:iconcourt-jester:
I think this has alot of emotion behind it, and that comes through to the reader. Its engaging enough, and I certainly liked it

The one thing I would say, is that I thought you could have come up with a more powerful line, only because when you use one ryme to tie a poem together like that, it deserves alot of thought. Maybe drop the middle line and include the thorns in the first one? Something like "As My feelings wilt away, the thorns still prick me night and day."

But its also great the way it is!
I enjoyed this peice, nice work~

--
:jester:
To be honest, I don't care.
:iconmental-mishap:
:(
again so sad
but as i said depressing poetry is so much easyer to write!
i like it
it has a heap of emotion thats for sure
a little repeative but i think in many ways it works like that
:heart:

--
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:icontnargwoxow:
This is really really sad.... :'( This is more recent then I thought. :glomp: *huggles*

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Details

April 26, 2006
1.4 KB

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